This is where the news is kept.
There is no news yet.
Oh, but when news pops up i will grasp it with both of my hands and wring it dry of it's natural, succulent, nourishing and informative juices...
Delicious.
I heard a rumor that the kid on the Oreo commercial was later mauled by the dog.
Then the dog was shot, whilst robbing a Seven-Eleven.
I remember when Seven-Eleven used to be called Fourteen-Twenty-Two. They were open for twenty six hours a day and you were never afraid to ask the Slurp-Jerk for a re-fill. Back then the Seven-Elevens used to distribute Slurpee cups to every household very early in the morning and later on that day you would ride your milk-crate billy-kart down to the Seven-Eleven and pick up your daily Slurpee ration. We had to ration out the Slurpees because Sadaam was melting the polar ice-caps with his warm, charming persona. My favourite flavour was "Lemon Lime Lawyer". This was everyone else's favourite flavour too even if they didn't admit it or openly denied it while i attempted to cleverly trick them into saying that it was.
We would all sit around the Dyson Brand Bagless Vacuum cleaner and sing songs about the good old days when the Fourteen-Twenty-Two was called the Twenty-Eight-Forty-Four. My schoolmates and I would play the X-Box Entertainment System and Sonic Hedgehogs until our thumbs were worn down to bloody little stumps. Our mate from school had a Sony DreamCast64 with Metal Gears and Donkey Kong Country and also The Double Dragons. I remember we used to play Street Fighter 2 until half past eight at night! Hahahah! Can you imagine staying up till eight thirty to play video games. By Gum! You can bet we were tired in the morning! Then we would all pile into the milk-crate billy-kart and head off to the front lines. You see, back then, children were sent to war to fight instead of to school to learn about mobile phones and DVD piracy. Those were the good old days. All those afternoons of violent video games prepared us well for heavy combat, and we thrived there. We loved it. They were simpler times They were better times. We were happy... So happy. Oh i remember it used to cost us fifty Rupees for a bomb, 2500 Credits for spreadfire, 500 Meseta for a Monomate and if you held down F7 you could replenish your magic bar. Oh those were the days... I remember one time during Operation Wolf, i beat Myconid Man, Cut Man and Iggy Koopa and bought myself the Dragon Mail. Oh how we laughed and laughed.
Good times... Good times...
